Patmos Isle

The life of a Pastor, one who has been beaten and left to die by his own kind.

Location: Texas, United States

I consider myself as one that has seen the dark side of humanity and has lived to speak of it.

Thursday, July 21, 2005

In This Place

I was preparing today for my message on Sunday and I come across the 9th chapter of Zechariah and it's 17th verse.

"How great is His goodness, and how great is His beauty"

You know there is one thing that has not been difficult in this cemetery (The city of the dead) is that it has never been a problem to worship.

It has never been a problem to lead others into worship.

Even though I question much and wonder among the tombs, wondering if one might be listening. Looking at the dates that have been carved by the hands of man, but only lived by the one that has now returned to the earth.

I do recall the day that I walked away from an open grave, from family and flowers and the song Amazing Grace. At that point I had never felt such loneliness, such a void, like that one piece of the puzzle was removed and who I was, who I was going to be, was taken and placed deep into the earth. I sat from a distance, watching as the men who return the body back to the earth lower my grandmother into the grown, it was there among this city that I introduced myself to Landon McKay he had died 15 years earlier, I did not know him, yet I burdened him with my sorrow. Yet I pulled myself up from there and determined I would worship. From that moment, I have not in all my sorrow and grief, forgotten to worship.

Even now, it's as if I can see those men, slowly, yet they prepare the place for me, my heart is still toward Him. My voice is still lifted towards Him, I manage somehow to pull my harp from the willow tree and sing and play for Him, play for Him a love song.

There is yet one thing I choose to remember.... He is worthy. Even though His hand has brought much sorrow and His children have hurt me so deeply and His "elite" have been no different than them who yelled CRUCIFY! Yet this one thing will I do, I will recall His worth. This one thing will I do, I will sing of His goodness. Darkness might have my mind, but from my heart will I sing.

Oh, Teach me thy song Father, teach me a love song.


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