Patmos Isle

The life of a Pastor, one who has been beaten and left to die by his own kind.

Location: Texas, United States

I consider myself as one that has seen the dark side of humanity and has lived to speak of it.

Friday, November 04, 2005

The Brain Thing

Well here I sit again, in a deep fog of..."Where am I" No, this is not a spiritual thing (I think) it is a physical thing.

I go through spells in my life, sometimes more often than others, that I can't even tell you my name, much less where I am at or what I am doing. It is like my brain pulls over to a rest stop and gets out and stretch.

Driving down the road today, I had to pull over, so that I could not just remember where I was going, but so I could remember where I was at. I know it sounds weird and hard to believe, but trust me, it is real and it is very scary.

Went into a store, where I know just about everyone that works there, the cashier has been very good to me this last year, even though his lifestyle would not be accepted by my friends and more so by them that say they love Jesus. Standing there talking with him, I went blank, I had nothing, I knew nothing, I could not even tell you at that moment my very name. He noticed that something was wrong and quickly covered for me and not knowing a thing about my condition or anything else he pulled me away from everyone so that I could come back to earth.

It always ends with me standing in the midst of a lot of people or sitting in a parking lot, crying, scared, beyond scared, terrified. Now I just wish I could go away, forget everything and everyone.


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